This post isn’t some cliche blog entry about Mother’s Day. It’s not a whine-fest about how my kids don’t appreciate me. It’s not even about me as a Mother, or of my kids. It’s about me, my Mom, and why I see Mother’s Day in a completely different light. And why it pisses me off to see how mothers are treated by today’s youth. If only they could be in my shoes for ONE single day. Or even some adults.
Yes, I know that not ALL women that have given birth are entitled to the terms “Mom” or “Mommy”, just like a man is sometimes just a sperm-donating prick that doesn’t deserve the name “Daddy”. But take those out of the equation, and this is how I feel.
Words from the Wise to ponder (as in, ME) …
Don’t let “Mother’s Day” be a so-called “passing fad” kind of day. Especially if you’re lucky enough to still have your mother in your life.
It’s not all about flowers, cards (store bought), candy and going out to eat. It’s about TELLING your Mom how much you love her, and personally (verbally) thanking her for all that she does, has done, and you know she will do in the future.
Flowers die, candy gets eaten, and cards (bought or hand-made) get stuffed away and forgotten about. But a Mother’s love, support and understanding never does any of those things.
They are things you will cherish the rest of your days, even after she is gone.
Take it from someone that has had to go through Mother’s Day motherless for the 23rd straight year now. I’d give anything to be able to even be held by her once more. Let alone be told “I love you” as I wish her a Happy Mother’s Day.
Because one day, she will not be here. She won’t be able to advise you, console you and tell you how much YOU mean to her. And to never have that in your life again, it changes you. In some ways, for the better. And in some ways, not. I’m not bitter or jealous. That would be petty of me. But I do sometimes get sad, if not even a bit angry, because of how I hear of some people speak of their GOOD mothers. If only they knew how much it cuts me to hear the complaints and the whining over piddly things.
Let their mothers be taken away for a day, and them be told that they won’t be coming back, I can only imagine the pain and the regret that they would feel at knowing that “fact”. I can hear all the “I should have” and “I want to tell her” sentences even as I am typing this and thinking of the subject. Because when not long after my mom died, I said those same sentences. I did the “bargaining with God”, I asked the “why” questions. I blamed MYSELF for her downward spiral and her ultimate demise.
It’s NOT a path anyone, let alone a child (or young teen or adult) should have to take, let alone would want to do. But I was forced in to that situation at the tender age of twelve years old. And to see how today’s youth and even older “kids” are so very disrespectful to their moms (and dads too!) makes me just want to slap the hell out of them and make them see the error of their ways.
So, this Mother’s Day, I say keep it simple, keep it real, and above all else, keep it personal and meaningful to her.
Happy Mother’s Day to all the mommy-readers of my blog! May it be a day of love, laughter, memories and togetherness.